


to honor a memory

by thedurianprince



Category: Granblue Fantasy (Video Game)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, M/M, assumes you've played Defender's Oath, hot hand-holding action, mild spoilers for Percival's fate ep and Siegfried (event), percival is nice for once in his life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-04
Updated: 2019-10-04
Packaged: 2020-11-23 20:44:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,242
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20895848
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thedurianprince/pseuds/thedurianprince
Summary: Percival won't let Siegfried avoid a conversation about becoming a knight without a king any longer.





	to honor a memory

The Grandcypher had acquired a schooner, and the captain being the sort of person they were, it was easy to ask to borrow it for as long as you needed, wherever you needed, for whatever you needed. It was a fast and functional ship for its size, and Ladiva had taken it upon herself to stock the pantry, berthing, every nook of the ship with comfort. Lamretta had even forgotten rum she was aging in the hold, and with Vane in the galley, it was easy to forget they were between missions, not on vacation.

Siegfried could have never predicted how trapped he would feel on it. 

“Oi, Siegfried. Are you listening?” Percival glares frustratedly at him. 

“I am, I am,” he replies with a quiet but pained smile. 

“Then answer my question.” 

For some time, Siegfried says nothing, thankful that Percival can appreciate conversations needing silence, but he’s also well aware it’s because he’s giving him time to think, not avoid the question. Lancelot or Vane, they would probably take it as a cue to leave Sieg be, remind him that he can rely on them, maybe change the subject, and let him leave it alone to continue to scab over. 

But Percival wanted something. Sieg wondered, vaguely, if he trapped him in this conversation, knowing full well he could leverage that and get Sieg to talk. 

“No. I haven’t discussed it with anyone.” 

“Hmph. Is that because there’s nothing to say or because you fear facing it?” 

Sieg is, for a moment, hurt and nostalgic at once. 

“What can I say? Josef died. Our companions gave him justice. And now he lies buried in the cemetery overlooking the training grounds. There’s not much else to add.” 

“Of course there is. I know very well the depth of loss the death of a man like him inspires,” Percival says pointedly, not letting Sieg avoid his eye. “You knew him longer and in far closer capacity than the rest of us.” 

“I did.” 

There is silence once again as Sieg avoids answering the implicit question. For Sieg it feels like just a moment, but apparently it’s much longer for Percival. He sighs, muttering exasperatedly as he does. 

“Honestly, Siegfried, this is why you’re hopeless. Fine.” Percival crosses his arms, ready to speak with his usual aplomb, but he hesitates. He briefly looks to the side, at a patch of blue sky with nothing in particular of interest, and Sieg notices his hand tighten around his arm. 

“Not long after I’d ascertained the sorts of people you were, I knew I was ready to die for you, Josef, and everything you stood for,” he says, louder than usual, as if the volume will cover his insecurity. “Your ideals were so valiant. You both truly cared for Feendrache and acted on it effectively. Even with the examples I had in Wales, I had never seen such brilliant leadership and knighthood. I saw the future I wanted to fight for, for Feendrache and myself. You were everything I strive to be.” 

“Were?” Siegfried chuckles quietly. “Percival, you’re really letting me have it.” 

Percival smiles slightly at that. “Humph. I’m not done.” 

“Yes, of course. Go on.” 

“...I know your world shattered that day. Mine and Lancelot’s and I suppose the mutt’s did, too, in their own ways. So it’s hopeless to pretend there’s nothing to say. All of us are willing if not eager to listen.” 

Naturally, Sieg cannot think of anything he could possibly say. 

“ ...Unless,” Percival adds hastily, losing his cocksure, smug nerve. “You aren’t actually interested in relying on us more. Or at all, for that matter.” 

Siegfried’s eyes sting as he laughs, Percival joining with him in nervous relief. His chest tightens and his stomach churns, perhaps more painfully than other times he thought of Josef. But less hopelessly so. 

Percival passes him a handkerchief. For a moment, Sieg freezes, not understanding why he needs it and recoiling at the intent behind the gesture. But the breeze blows against his wet cheeks, and he takes it. 

“Well. This is new.” Percival says confidently, but his gaze is soft. 

“Very much so.” Sieg tilts his head up, looking to the sky as he often did after laying flowers on Josef’s grave. “But I suppose it’s honoring his efforts, when I think about it.” 

“How so?” 

Sieg hesitates again, the same clutch in his chest and pains through his body gripping at him, but he wipes his eyes, takes a breath, and lets himself remember. 

“....Did I ever tell any of you how we met?” 

“No,” Percival replies, but he looks at Sieg eagerly. 

“I’ll have to share the whole thing when Vane fixes dinner later.” 

“Do. But you still haven’t answered the question.” 

Siegfried takes a deep breath, letting memories of Josef that serve nothing but his own nostalgia wash over him. “The short version is that he recruited me because of a vision he had. He liked the thought of seeing the unrefined person I was sharpened with chivalry and knighthood.” 

Percival makes an equally impressed and amused sound, smiling as he’d done countless times when Josef struck a chord with his own ambitions. Siegfried had not realized he’d missed that expression nor that he hadn’t seen it in years. 

“...Perhaps this has always been obvious, but much of what I taught you all of knighthood, I learned from him. And...” Siegfried’s voice freezes, and Percival waits patiently. “...From him, through learning that, he convinced me of my humanity.” 

The moment afterwards feels like the sky around them is holding its breath. Sieg’s words hang in the air, and Percival’s silence offers the reverence for Josef and Sieg he expressed earlier. And with the same respect, he puts his hand on Sieg’s as they breathe again, and Sieg feels that he is shaking just a little bit. 

“...When you disappeared in the aftermath, I was deeply in conflict,” Percival replies before clearing his throat to hide his unsteadiness. “I couldn’t believe my captain could do that to the king he loved so much. Or to Lancelot. Or to Feendrache’s people, and their safety he had so brilliantly worked for. I...wondered if I had misread you. That the ideals you taught us were a lie.” 

Siegfried clasps his other hand on Percival’s. He feels Percival twitch as the gut instinct to jerk away flares and quiets. 

“--The point is,” he hastily continues. “When all was said and done, and I left the order, I was still looking to everything you and Josef lead with to forge my path forward. I told myself that even if the leaders I admired were lost to this world, I still owed it to them to live by their ideals and the human truth I found in them. And I do, to this day. So I would agree...to rely on us more and share these things...they would indeed be honoring his wishes.” 

_“Siegfried… What is it that you’re so afraid of?”_

_“I’m not afraid of anything.” _

_“From where I’m standing, it appears you keep your distance not to prevent yourself from hurting others, but to prevent yourself from being hurt. Why do you go to such lengths to avoid getting close to others?” _

Siegfried doesn’t bother to hide or wipe away his tears. He looks up at the sky as his chest loosens. 

“Is that so?” he says, his voice choked behind a smile.

**Author's Note:**

> The working title of this was "GUESS I'LL DIE BUT JOSEF ALREADY DID THAT." 
> 
> Sorry, Sieg.


End file.
